another tgif

this rigshot came out perfectly, and also got featured in Traffic Magazine Online, special thanks to Roy Zakaria and Zahid Kasim for this, im so fucking love it, well yeah im blessed with my awesome surrounds, meeting with new friends, thanks a lot guys!

p/s: thank God its friday

today's activity

today i guess today was the best day, special thanks to Roy Zakaria and Zahid Kassim (Traffic Magazine) for this photoshoot session been done in MAEPS, serdang, big thanks also to Joo for the invitation, im honored that you guys willing to take shots for my baby, thanks a lot guys!

til' next time!

p/s: rigshot was awesome!

 

hopes and dreams killed me, again

nahh, dont wanna say much, guess its already happened, its just sad sometimes i couldnt get what i wished the most, well i guess i have to accept for it, things changed even though ive already noticed it earlier and theres nothing i can do about it,

you push too hard and you might let it lose, but if you let it go, apparently it wont come back to you

idk,

that feeling

you know how you feel when you realised youre slowly torn apart into pieces, yes that kinda feeling,

dont bother,

i choose to be this way and i dont mind to stay, im not giving up,

til' the end,

revenged!

have you ever wonder, some things you once said in the past life before, it got you back in the future now so sudden ?

apparently i just did, 

was laying down on my bed while scrolling my twitter then so sudden it came out from nowhere, a thought once i let out years back then it got me back now,

"hidup aku sekarang bangsat, sampai masa akan datang kalau aku hidup lagi dan gelak balik kenang masa lepas,"

well, ive been at my lowest part of my life before now, those years i felt like i was gone under and made me feel like i dont ever want to live anymore,

tbt,

i never thought i could survived all these til now, i was young, hopeless, living those days like waiting for my end to come, im known to myself love to messed up everything i could possible do, im not a proud son nor not a good friend, most of the past life time im not good doing at anything, with all diseases i had before, i was like not to give a care about at almost anything except dying, im better off dead back then, totally not motivated at all,

after 3 times of suicide trials, im still mad at myself, i was deeply mad to God why the hell did He wont let me die, still not everyone ever knew how i felt that time, im usually love to keep my distance from others, i lost both of my brother and sister, once i fell in love with a girl yet i screwed things up and i was depressed and affected worst of my life back then,

as i grow up and lived those days, im starting to thinking, about everything ive done, met with few new people, im starting to appreciate things surround me, im changing far beyond what i had back then, one thing i realised that im not that strong as i ever knew, i need help, i need attention from others so they will help me to get back up and start over back again, and apparently yes i did,

im slowly to moving over things ive left before, changing myself to be a better person, not just for me, for my family as well, i keep myself close and closer to the ones i love and care, learn and appreciate valuable things in life now, til now i guess i could say, im laughing whenever im thinking about my past life, those days are gone forever, only certain things im keeping in my mind as for a reminder to myself,

someone once told me,

"stop saying sorry too much"

this is what i got from my past life, im easily feel sorry for what ive done, im afraid of what they could think of me, im fragile, feeling sensitive about certain things could got me down again, i cant never messed up things again and i wont, im tired of letting things go, tired of disappointing, i just dont want things got me screwed up again and again,

get back up and revenged to the past life!

life is not a race, its about survival, how youre gonna survive to live for another tomorrow or end up being a loser, dont be afraid cause you know youre not, all of us are born to survive, achieve what you want the most, be someone important to someone else, keep loyal to the Lord Himself, and most importantly, make your parents proud - danie faizal, 2014

imperfection is one another my perfection

i love you without knowing how, or when, or from where,

i love you simply, without problems or pride,

i love you in this way because i do not know any other way of loving but this,

in which there is no i or you, so intimate that your hand upon my chest is my hand, so intimate that when i fall asleep your eyes close,

you may not be my first, my last, or my only,

i loved before i may love again,

but if i love you now, nothing else matters,

i may not perfect but youre my perfection,

i admit of being human and making mistakes, hold onto you and give you the most i can,

i may not be thinking about you every second of the day,

but i will give you a part of mine that i know you can break - my heart,

i smile when you makes me happy, let me know when i make you mad,

i miss you when youre not there,

im nothing special, of this i am sure,

im a common person with common thoughts and ive led a common life,

still there are no monuments dedicated to me and my name will soon be forgotten,

yet but i love you with all my heart and soul, and to me, this has always been enough,

if i had a flower for every time i thought of you,

i could walk through my garden forever.

so it's not gonna be easy,

its going to be really hard,

im gonna have to work at this everyday,

but i want to do that because i want you,

i want all of you, forever, everyday,

you and me, everyday,

in vain have i struggled, it will not do,

my feelings will not be repressed,

allow me to tell you how ardently i admire and love you.

because,

you are, and always have been, my dream.

tgif

idk know if theres something is wrong,

i can feel it everyday it stay strong

right or wrong it making me feel uneasy

lot of things changed a bit lately

days after days you came thru

night after night ill keep missing you

will you stay here and never leave me ?

stand by my side as long as you can be

nothings better than having you around

the heart beats softly without a sound

my dearly beloved, i love you everyday

never cross in my mind youll be far away 

til the end,

 

too much attentions

id never expect all these gonna came thru, you know that kinda attentions youre gonna get when you already involve into some cultures or scenes or community and else, yes im one of those people,

at first, its kinda fun and excited, meeting with new friends, going thru with new experiences, getting all the knowledges, having fun and so on, but then eventually at some points, when you have your name rising up, lot of people are getting to know you in person, trust me things will change, like im going thru right know, idk where i did wrong with all these, i know sometime i could mess things up but really i dont expect things will came out from me like this, its like every single thing you do and people starting to talk about behind your back, starting to hating on you, couldnt saying the truth in front of you and serving you with bullshits, the fact is people starting to envy you because what have you achieved and so on,

idk,

these kinda things are more complicated than what it may be seen, truth to be told its sucks much, it feels like everything is turning back against you, at this time then youll know which one are standing beside and support you, or others may be like they are just like another 'talk like cock' kinda people you know, well i guess i have to lay low for a while or maybe its the way its gotta be, im sorry if i did things arent meant to be, and i know im just another 'newbies' who trying to fit in with other 'big boys'

til next time,

another dream part 3

terima kasih abah untuk hadiah birthday danie :3

birthday celebration!

well yeah, abah and mak decided to take all of us for dinner celebration of my 23rd birthday, along with adik, makngah, pakngah, edi, arip, kak ainul, bari and keram, at Swensens @ Subang Parade, 

dapat cake ice cream oreo! even though guwa tak minat cake lol anyway, thanks mak and abah for it, its simple yet meaningful, til next year :)

p/: bride cuga upcoming! 

time well spent

bosan kat jb taktahu nak pergi mana, as usual mesti singgah city square jalan jalan cuci mata, masuk singgah kat butik crossover, usha kasut kasut,

so i just added this to my shoes collection, everytime guwa beli kasut mesti hitam, mak pun komplen suruh cari warna lain haha

so yeah she picked this for me, thanks mak

*gambar ehsan gugel, tapi memang beli macam ni

p/s: vans dah guwa berpisah tiada lulz